Polyamory - love polygon

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Polyamory - love polygon
Polyamory - love polygon

What is polyamory and how is it different from polygamy? Symbolism, ideals and types of such love relationships. Public opinion about polyamorous love is “for” and “against”.

Polyamory is a certain way of life and the practice of love relationships, when one or several people are openly in intimacy that does not cause rejection in any of them, whether it be a feeling of jealousy or other negative emotions.

What is polyamory?

Polyamorous relationships
Polyamorous relationships

A monogamous family does not live in a vacuum; husband and wife communicate with a large number of people at work and outside the home. New affectionate acquaintances are made, often ending in intimacy. From the point of view of ethical standards, betrayal "on the side" is an immoral act, it entails discord in the family up to divorce.

To find a way out of such a crisis situation, nowadays an original system of views on love relationships has appeared, which is called "polyamory".

The word "polyamory" consists of two parts: the ancient Greek "poly", which means "many, many," and the Latin "amore" - love. The literal translation means "to love a lot", "to love more than one."

People who hold such views believe that it is quite natural for a person (male-female) to be in intimate relationships with several at once. It depends on the very need for such a connection, it may not exist at all, but if there is a desire, there is no need to be ashamed.

This closeness should be based on the complete trust of all participants (partners) of such a love "polygon". Moreover, there are no clear boundaries of the polyamorous connection, it can arise at any period of the life of its adept - whether he is married or not. It can be long or limited to a short period.

Polyamorous advocates do not necessarily dwell on the sexual side of relationships. Mutual interests, such as sports or the arts, are often at the heart of a relationship. This does not exclude intimacy at all, but gives it a spiritualized, friendly orientation, excludes the purely physiological side of sex.

Therefore, what does polyamory mean, one should talk about its ethical side. It is based on the full respect and trust of all participants in the polyamorous community. Only in mutual trusting communication and discussion of the issues that have arisen, when the opinions of everyone are taken into account, such a love union can be conflict-free and long.

Polyamory, as opposed to monogamous marriage, is often called “conscientious, responsible and ethical non-monogamy”. Assuming that in such a union there are no destructive emotions that destroy the relationship between a man and a woman. Therefore, supporters of such relationships believe that you need to learn to control your negative feelings.

It's important to know! The moral of polyamory is that jealousy should not ruin a man's relationship with a woman. They can live openly with several partners and at the same time get along peacefully.

How is polyamory different from polygamy?

Unconventional polyamorous union
Unconventional polyamorous union

At first glance, polyamory and polygamy are one thing, implying that a man and a woman can have several (many) love relationships. However, there are still significant differences between them. They concern the very structure of such relations.

Let's take a closer look at the differences between polyamory and polygamy:

  1. Love is the main thing … Historically, polygamy has developed due to the natural conditions of people living in a particular society. For example, in the highlands in the countries of Central Asia (Tibet, Nepal, some regions of China, India), where there is very little land suitable for cultivation so that the land remains in the family, the brothers married one woman. Love relationships in a polygamous marriage did not play a significant role. Unfavorable socio-economic conditions of life determined the consciousness of the population. There is no time for love, but to be alive. To continue their lineage, men had to have some wives, and vice versa, in some societies, women had more than one husband. Polyamory is a completely different matter. In such a relationship, love is at the forefront. Sex does not always come first here, although it plays a big role. Such an alliance, say, a man with several women may not imply family relationships and children. He is open, voluntary, and without jealousy. In short, polyamory is a festive attitude towards life, when several men and women are very close, live openly and do not bother about it.
  2. In polyamorous relationships, everyone is equal.… Unlike polygamous marriage, where there is a hierarchy of family relationships. The family may be an older man (polygyny) or a woman (polyandry). For example, in Islamic countries, where a man can officially have several wives, he is the head of the family. In polyamory, all relationships are built on a voluntary and equal basis. Such a friendly alliance can be long or short, at the discretion of its members.
  3. Polyamory is not officially recognized … Polygamy today exists in many Asian countries (Muslim countries) and the Pacific Islands. For example, in Polynesia, polyandry is common, when a woman can have multiple husbands. Such relations in some countries are prohibited (state and religious), but still continue to exist due to ancient traditions. Polyamory is not recognized by the countries of the world. It is the product of hazing relationships between the sexes. People who want to live their lives easily and cheerfully have "invented" this kind of love relationship. Very democratic. Nobody imposes such a way of life on anyone. This is a deeply personal matter.
  4. Polyamory is not limited to the number of partners … For example, in Muslim countries, legislation limits the number of wives, there can be no more than four of them. All rights and responsibilities in such a polygamous family are rigidly distributed between husband and wives. In polyamorous cohabitation, the number of participants is not specified. There may be two or more of them. The main thing here is that the very possibility of having lovers (mistresses) is allowed. This does not make the partner or partner jealous, but is taken for granted.
  5. Polyamory is an unconventional union … An innovative resolution of relations between the sexes in modern society, when sexual relations before marriage became the norm, which led to a crisis of public morality. The feminist movement (the fight for equal rights for women) also left its mark. It was necessary to oppose something to the monogamous union, which in fact quite often became bashfully disguised as polygamy, when a woman was often humiliated in marriage. So a new extraordinary philosophy about the relationship of the sexes arose, declaring that the third in the love triangle is not at all superfluous.
  6. New ethics … Relying on old traditions, monogamy has ceased to meet the requirements of the time. An attempt to improve it was a fresh look at ethical norms, which advocates of polyamorous relations began to preach. The voluntary intimate union of a man or woman with several partners at once, provided that no one is jealous of anyone, became a new word in the old traditional morality, when women were condemned for ties outside of marriage, and society looked condescendingly at men-women.

Polyamory is not accepted by most people, but it is still not sexual promiscuity, promiscuous sexual intercourse of lustful people. Polyamorous relationships are based primarily on the spiritual closeness of partners.

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