The importance of first impressions. Factors that determine the perception of a person when meeting, as well as everything about how to form the correct opinion about yourself. Effects that can distort reality during the first meeting. The first impression is the image that is formed at the first meeting with a person in other people. This happens not only due to the receipt of emotional and physical information, but also due to the development of their own personal reaction to them. Thus, a certain set of characteristics of this individual is formed in the head, in accordance with which further communication will develop. For all mankind, this process is very important, because it is he who predetermines any relationship between people. Therefore, everyone is trying to learn how to make the impression that he needs in this situation.
Factors in the formation of the first impression
The process during which the impression is formed lasts only the first few minutes of the acquaintance. Despite this, it fits in people's heads as a guideline in building future relationships. How a person is perceived at this moment depends on many factors that influence the formation of the first impression. Most modern psychologists try to make a list of the most important points to look at first.
Today, among them are distinguished:
- External appearance… This factor can be explained as an assessment of the overall picture. This refers to the emotions that arise for the first time at the sight of a given person. They are not backed up by conversations or manners, but only based on how he feels when he appears during a meeting.
- Elements of appearance… No matter how anyone tries to argue, the most important point in the formation of the first impression of a person is the assessment of material qualities. This is clothing, and the condition of hair, nails, skin. Everything that can be seen with the naked eye even before the start of a conversation. Absolutely all people pay attention to this and take note of it long before recognizing a particular person as a person.
- Expression of emotions… Only after evaluating the previous qualities are the intangible characteristics of a person taken into account. At this moment, attention is paid to the manifestation of feelings. It is important how this person will behave in a given situation, whether he will smile during jokes and what views on life he shares. Thus, moral qualities are assessed, which is also important when meeting.
- Features of behavior… Many people are able to determine many traits of his character from the first minutes by the posture of a person. To do this, they assess the gait, the position of the arms and legs during communication, gestures, movements of facial muscles and even the nature of a smile. These and many other points make it possible to determine the intentions and openness of the opponent, his habits and attitude towards the company. This point is extremely important also because it helps to find out the type of character of a person.
- Individual qualities… The last thing that is assessed when meeting a person is his personal characteristics. These are the qualities that make him stand out from the crowd. These can be both views on life and the presence of a mole on the chin. In a word, something that can catch and catch the attention of those present.
Most often, these factors are used in this order.But, despite this, each person has a tendency to notice what is more important and interesting by changing this sequence.
First impression-distorting effects
Considering that the first impression about a person is formed in an incredibly short period of time, it cannot be called objective. The thing is that its formation is influenced not only by the present moment, but also by other factors. These are various circumstances and information that can distort the resulting picture. It often happens that when an individual sees his opponent, he already has certain subconscious biases about him.
There are several effects that have this effect:
- Halo… This concept denotes an exaggeration of the importance of the first impression. After all, it can create a certain image that will be taken into account in all subsequent meetings. For example, if at the first acquaintance with a woman she likes and interests a man, then she will justify all his bad actions in the future herself. Exactly the same situation may develop and not in his favor. If he is late or unsuccessfully joked on the first date, then there is no point in hoping for the second.
- Primacy… When evaluating a person, everyone tends to set their own priorities. And therefore, someone first looks at the color of the eyes, and others at the neatness of clothes or generosity. It is the impression from the first point that can determine the attitude towards a given person in general. Therefore, someone can be conquered by a beautiful jacket or by pronouncing the desired phrase, even if, in addition, the person cannot boast of anything else. Perception shapes what was presented initially.
- Boomerang… Almost everyone knows what this phenomenon means. The point is that people are always inclined to somehow oppose the influence on them. Therefore, in relation to those who immediately try to join the team, attract attention or put themselves above others, negative emotions are generated. Everyone perceives them as enemies and, despite their subsequent actions, they are looking for a catch everywhere.
- Condescension… This feature is exclusively a trait of a person who has to form his own opinion about someone. There are people who tend to feel sorry for others, so they will initially be well-disposed towards everyone. Their opinion cannot be called objective, but this is how they see others.
- Stereotyping… A very common phenomenon that occurs in relationships between men and women. It is in such cases that people tend to perceive new acquaintances with a preconceived bad opinion. If a lady was once cheated, then each subsequent male representative will need to prove to her that he is not like that. And it doesn't matter at all that she has no reason to think so, because the stereotype that has developed earlier is guiding here.
- Projection… This happens among people who very much do not like any qualities in themselves. That is why they subconsciously try to see them in others. Consequently, the opinion about a person will be initially bad, because it is supported by the most unloved habit or character trait. People rarely notice such problems themselves, but communication with them is still quite difficult.
How to make a good impression
To build any relationship, it is very important that a person is recognized from the good side. Not all people know how to show all their advantages, and this is quite capable of alienating others from them. You don't have to reread millions of clever books and monographs to learn how to make a first impression. You just have to allow yourself to be yourself and take into account some facts about your opponent.
Features of behavior when meeting
First you need to collect your thoughts and set a goal for this meeting. It is necessary to clearly understand how important it is for a person what they think of him.Having found out for yourself these criteria, you can begin to prepare yourself.
Here are some tips to follow when meeting:
- Be natural… When a person has an important meeting, he tries to prepare for it as carefully as possible. But outwardly, such ideality may seem feigned and fake, which will repel even more. Moreover, all the acquaintance will be spent on reflection, so as not to forget something and not say too much. Therefore, such a long preparation will not lead to anything good. It is better to be yourself and communicate with a person sincerely, without unnecessary fuss.
- Do not flatter… In order to please someone, it is not at all necessary to completely imitate him. All people are individual in their actions and views. And having your own opinion is more to your liking than sycophancy and conciliation with everything. Of course, you shouldn't defend your point of view too fiercely so as not to offend your opponent. Everything should be in moderation.
- Enjoy the meeting… Regardless of what kind of people will be present during the conversation, you need to calm yourself down and approach this situation wisely. If the meeting should still take place, then it is better not to oppose it, but, on the contrary, to look for points of contact with the person. You need to listen to him carefully and take useful information for yourself. Such a meeting can be fruitful for both parties in building a constructive approach.
- Take a look at yourself from the side… Sometimes this skill helps a person to make life easier during important meetings. After all, we look at ourselves from a completely different angle. An individual's gestures and jokes can only be understood by him alone, but outsiders are able to perceive them as an insult. Therefore, it is worth revising your communication manners so that they are accessible and understandable to everyone.
- Define your benefits… To interest someone, you must first of all determine for yourself how exactly this can be done. After that, it will be much easier to establish communication, because the person will know his main advantages. They must attract attention from outside and make communication interesting. A sense of humor, friendliness can serve as such attractive moments. If a person cannot understand what interesting he has to offer, you need to carefully work on yourself.
Rules for conducting a conversation with an interlocutor
First, it is always necessary to get to know your opponent as closely as possible, to learn to understand his interests and outlook on life. This will help you build a more constructive conversation without embarrassing moments.
Secondly, it is worth adhering to the universal rules of conducting a conversation, which are generally accepted:
- Listen… This is required by every interlocutor. It is very important and necessary for everyone to pay attention to them, show tolerance and nod their heads in response to some phrases. If such an opportunity was provided, then the conversation will be very productive in the future. At least out of a sense of politeness, a person will not be denied requests, they will be called a good listener and interlocutor.
- Don't say much… It is very important that the opponent does not feel superfluous during this kind of monologue. People who start a conversation by discussing their problems only scare others away from themselves. Do not bother your interlocutor with excessive attention and chatter. Any conversation should end before the person begins to hint or speak directly about it.
- Address by name… For some reason, few people remember this point in the modern world. But in fact, any person is always pleased to hear his name. Therefore, you need to try to do this as often as possible. Thus, respect for the interlocutor is shown and the first impression of his opponent is also improved. Naturally, this does not apply to business meetings, where you need to address by name and patronymic.
- Make eye contact… As strange as it may sound, the method really works. A direct look into the eyes suggests that the person he is talking to is really important. The maneuver will definitely be appreciated.
How to make a first impression - watch the video:
The psychology of first impressions is extremely popular in the modern world. Influence on subsequent communication and the development of any relationship is almost always based on this principle. Therefore, it is very important to be able not only to correctly express yourself when meeting, but also to learn how to objectively evaluate your new acquaintances. Thus, a person will never have problems with misunderstanding or underestimating his personality, and all important conversations will become ordinary small talk.