How to overcome your fear of communication

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How to overcome your fear of communication
How to overcome your fear of communication
Anonim

Social phobia and the causes of its occurrence. The article will give recommendations on how to get rid of the fear of communication for children and adults. Fear of communication is a phobia that is characteristic of insecure interlocutors. There can be many reasons for its occurrence, which greatly complicates a person's life. Successful people do not experience this fear, but nevertheless the voiced problem is quite common. It is necessary to understand the origins of this pathology and how to deal with it.

Causes of fear of communication

Peer bullying
Peer bullying

Problems, discomfort when communicating with strangers is a problem that should not be dismissed. After a detailed study of it, psychologists came to the conclusion that these factors-provocateurs can serve as the reasons for the fear of communication:

  • Criticism from the inner circle … If at the same time people are significant for a person, then the mechanism of such a phenomenon is triggered. With a systematic negative analysis on the part of relatives or friends, social phobia may arise, which will then be problematic to get rid of without the help of specialists.
  • Peer bullying … Very often, the fear of communicating with others begins in childhood, when the opinion of his classmates is very important to the child. If the relationship with them is accompanied by insults and offensive nicknames, then there is a high probability that an unformed person will begin to fear communication in the future.
  • Inability to communicate with the opposite sex … The fear of communicating with men is very often laid down in childhood, if the girl had a domineering and oppressive father. A harsh mother can significantly complicate the future personal life of her son, setting an unsuccessful example to the child with her model of behavior.
  • Disastrous performance in front of an audience … Many people are terrified of communicating with other actors after a similar fiasco. They begin to scroll in advance in their heads the negative consequences of the voiced process, which they themselves invented.
  • Excessive shyness … People cannot be the same in character even if twins have appeared in the family. All kinds of complexes and embarrassment on every occasion become a serious prerequisite for the development of social phobia in a person.
  • Inability to formulate thoughts … Some victims of circumstance simply fail to say what they think. Such a disadvantage is fertile ground for the emergence of fear of communication with others.

Note! These reasons are very often rooted in childhood, when it is still possible to get rid of the fear of communication. If the problem has already become an established fact, then it will be much more problematic to solve it.

Varieties of fear of communication

Fear of talking on the phone
Fear of talking on the phone

Psychologists have seriously approached the study of the voiced phenomenon, which prevents many people from becoming successful personalities. Experts have identified several types in order to then determine the methods of dealing with them:

  1. Fear of dialogue with strangers … Some self-contained subjects are afraid to communicate with those people whom they see for the first time in their lives. Horror fetters such unfortunate people when they have a dialogue with an unfamiliar person. They are not able to connect even two words, because they fall into a real torpor.
  2. Fear of communication with peers … Shy children who are unable to stand up for themselves are prone to a similar phobia. They usually do not have their own opinion, or they are afraid to express it. Trying to always keep in the background, they often become outcasts in the team.
  3. Fear of contact with the opposite sex … As already mentioned, very often the problem must be looked for in childhood. The fear of communicating with girls or guys triggers an unhappy personal life. Few people will be interested in communicating with a self-contained person with a large baggage of complexes.
  4. Fear of speaking in front of an audience … You can often find such individuals who calmly communicate with everyone, but suffer from this phobia. They cannot be pulled on the lasso on the stage or behind the podium for oration. Hundreds of excuses will be invented because public speaking is worse for such individuals than death.
  5. Fear of talking on the phone … This problem is not uncommon. Many people believe that literally all women love to chat for hours in a voice-over mode with their girlfriends. Of course, there are enough chatterboxes among the fair sex, but in some cases people are not able to conduct telephone conversations without seeing their interlocutor.
  6. Fear of communication with superiors … Loyal leadership is a gift of fate, which not every person can find. If the poor fellow has to constantly contact the tyrant boss, then a voiced type of social phobia begins to form. Finding a good job is extremely difficult, so sometimes you have to adapt to this problem.

Signs of a person's fear of communication

Fear of communication in a girl
Fear of communication in a girl

It is possible to calculate a person with such a complex by the following symptoms, which are sometimes visible to the naked eye:

  • Increased heart rate during dialogue … Sociophobes, even in the absence of health problems, begin to experience significant discomfort with the announced plan. Their heart is ready to jump out of their chest if they understand that they will not get away from communicating with other people or an audience.
  • Tense muscles and nervous tremors when talking … Such obvious signs of anxiety give away a person who is afraid of communicating with someone. His entire speech is feverish and only testifies to a great desire to end the dialogue.
  • Redness of the face when communicating … Confusion sometimes only colors a person, but everything is fine in moderation. If, during communication, the subject becomes burgundy to the color of a beet, then this is not a good indicator of his physical and moral condition. Perhaps he suffers from high blood pressure, but in most cases this is characteristic of social anxiety disorder.
  • Sweating during dialogue … If it's hot outside, wet armpits are not at all a reason to think that in front of you is a person who is afraid of communication. However, under favorable weather conditions, a sweating interlocutor may simply be afraid of contact with someone.
  • Stuttering during conversation … If a person does not have problems with diction, then periodically confused speech can signal panic during the ongoing dialogue. At the same time, people with phobias have a shifting gaze or an unwillingness to meet other people's gaze at all.
  • Abdominal pain with fear of communication … If the fear of contact develops into a real horror, then such physiological problems often begin. The interlocutor can literally twist in half from the stress when the need for dialogue.
  • Dry mouth when dealing with people … The throat becomes, as if in the desert, when a person is worried when communicating. Many people, when public speaking, ask permission to take a sip of water to relax and take a breath.

All of these signs can be combined with each other, creating a serious problem for humans. It is very important to get rid of it, because otherwise there can be no question of any successful life.

Risk group of people with fear of communication

Women on maternity leave
Women on maternity leave

Not every person suffers from a voiced phobia, because many of us love to contact others. Fear of communication can be both a factor of a certain character, and a consequence of the events that have occurred.

Most often, such a contingent of people encounters a similar problem:

  1. Women on maternity leave … They can talk in most cases with the same young mothers, which makes their interests narrower. If they happen to intersect with people leading an active lifestyle, then this often enters the maternity into numbness.
  2. Housewives … Such women sometimes limit their life to four walls. If their friends, after going to work and enrolling a child in kindergarten, can quickly adapt to society, then in this case everything is much more deplorable. Housewives simply lose their skills in dialogue with strangers, which becomes a serious problem for them.
  3. People with increased self-esteem of the created image … Self-idealization can lead to an elementary isolation of a person. He is afraid of criticism from people and debunking the myth about himself. It is easier for him to be in constant solitude than to try to establish communication with the environment.
  4. Insecure people … This can be a consequence of both the acquired complexes and the character warehouse. With such a problem, there is a chance that another recluse will appear who is afraid of communication.
  5. Intimidated person … A victim of the prevailing circumstances is afraid of everything and everyone, and therefore is not ready to meet with society. She sees a catch and a threat in any word of the interlocutor, which is noticeable even with the naked eye.

Methods for Dealing with Fear of Communication

Any problem needs to be dealt with when there is still an opportunity to fix everything. Age-related tactics in this case is extremely important, because it provides a different approach to eliminating the phobia.

Ways to Eliminate Fear of Communication in Children

Communication with the child
Communication with the child

The child is often exposed to someone else's influence, which is not always positive. Of great importance for him is the opinion of the children's collective, which forms a model for the further behavior of a child or adolescent.

Experts recommend that parents sound the alarm at the first symptoms of a phobia in their children and deal with them as follows:

  • Fairytale therapy … Fearful and alarming situations can be dealt with using the sounded method. It is necessary to build a narrative with a mandatory happy ending in such a way that the child will lose all fears about communicating with other people. However, you should be very careful in composing the story, because the excessive gullibility of children towards strangers can turn into a real tragedy.
  • Fixation on the positive … In a close-knit family with a calm household environment, the younger generation rarely develops sociopathy. Adults, by personal example, must show the correct model of behavior so that they do not suffer in the future over the question of how to overcome the child's fear of communication.
  • Visiting sections or an acting class … Children who are actively involved in extracurricular life are much more sociable than their peers. They overcome stage fright, train their character and, as a result, independently fight their phobias. Acting courses are especially helpful. They develop communication skills, help to learn to control their emotions, to express them correctly. And such children are rarely bored, so phobias very quickly fade into the background.
  • Psychologist's help … The specialist knows better the child's psyche, which has not yet fully formed. In a particularly difficult situation, he may even recommend taking certain medications. It is strictly forbidden to prescribe medicines for your child on your own or on the advice of overly wise acquaintances.

Ways to Eliminate Fear of Communication in Adults

Putting the patient into hypnosis
Putting the patient into hypnosis

In this case, fairy tale therapy will not help, because the problem is formed in a mature person. When asked how to overcome the fear of communication in adults, psychologists answer as follows:

  1. Defending your own opinion … It's easier for yourself to decide than to translate the idea into reality. However, we have only one life, so we need to be able to stand up for ourselves. At first it will be very frightening, but then those around them will themselves see the changes that have occurred to the person and will stop putting pressure on him with their authority.
  2. Ability to refuse a manipulator … Some people try to avoid communication because they are afraid of being used. Knowing their soft nature and compliance on all issues, they withdraw into themselves. You should develop a clear rejection system for yourself, and over time this will become a habit.
  3. Establishing visual contact … It will not work out right away, but there is nowhere to rush in solving the voiced problem. To begin with, you can choose for yourself the forum you like, where questions of interest to the victim of a phobia are discussed. Then you should try to communicate with as many people as possible in real life.
  4. Job search in a large team … This is a great way to train yourself to be around people. It is worth forbidding yourself to think that the world is full of insidious and bloodthirsty personalities. There are many more good people, so you need to make yourself a positive mindset.
  5. Hypnosis … In especially advanced cases, experts recommend resorting to this method. Having immersed the patient in such a state, the therapist finds the true causes of the phobia. Often the victim himself cannot determine the root of the problem, but reveals it under hypnosis.

How to overcome the fear of communication - watch the video:

Fear of communication is a serious life nuisance with very dire consequences for a person. If you do not solve it by the most radical methods, then you can forget about success and happiness. Only a stubborn struggle for your future will make a person an accomplished personality.

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